DeFeet

I used to have feet.

Don't get me wrong, they're still there, attached, as they always have been, to my ankles, but they're different now. They used to be somewhat cute (if feet can be cute), neat and compact. I had no hesitation about displaying them in chic little sandals and pumps. But now, it seems, they've grown, flattened, spread and somehow even changed direction. And I really hadn't noticed until yesterday when I went to buy new sneakers.

I thought I was being very clever when I wrote down the size, model number and style name of my old shoes. "I'll just replace them exactly," I thought. "Go into the shoe store, tell them what I want and that'll be it. Maybe I'll try them on, just in case..."

Good thing I did.

Those exact same sneakers - just like the ones I've been wearing on my morning walk for the past two years - didn't fit at all. They looked the same all right, but when I put them on... nope. Not even close. I needed a half size larger, and a wider fit. And a different make entirely. (I've been wearing the same brand for years - I'm a very loyal consumer.)

Now I've been having 'foot issues' for a while. Heel spurs (hurt like hell) have made orthotics a necessity. I have two pair - one for 'party shoes' the other for 'sports shoes', and they work quite nicely. I've found sandals with good support (Mephistos if you're interested - too expensive, but they last for seven years; then you send them back to the factory and they'll rebuild them for you for $75, which means they'll last for another seven years. Therefore the actual exorbitant price can be amortized over 14 years or so, which makes their cost somewhat justifiable... but I digress). However through it all my feet - at least the look of them - stayed the same. Or so I thought.

I looked at them - really looked at them - this morning. They're definitely wider. The toes are... well... lumpier, and they seem to be pointing in a bit of a different direction. A couple of the toenails are looking thicker and slightly off color. (Bright red polish will fix that, no doubt).

So no more cute little 'Betty Crocker F*^k Me' shoes for me. Not that I've worn them in ages, but I still felt I could justifiably eye them in the shoe store when I saw them. No more. I'll head right to the sensible section and shop there.

Isn't that grown up of me?

I'm going for a walk...